10 Perfect Presents For 10 Types of Geeks

Dorks. Nerds. Geeks. If you read this site, there's a good chance you are one, or at least are friends with one. That may have been a bad thing in middle school, but in adulthood, we really start to see that thinking different is actually a great thing.

You probably have a few dweeby friends on the list who might be a little hard to shop for if you don't know where to find the perfect gift. So to help you out, here's a few suggestions:

1. Perfect Gift For The Geek on the Go:

Everyone hates being stuck at the airport, but when people have to fly regularly it really becomes a drag. The solution? Watching videos from your iPod -only without having to stare at that tiny screen. The iPod Video Glasses are a super cool gift for a person who doesn't mind looking lame.

2. Perfect Gift For The Geeky Homemaker:

Nerd cooking is admittedly not the highlight of the culinary world, but hey, everyone needs to eat. With that in mind, why not get a gift that any Star Wars fan is sure love and able to use. The Darth Vader Toaster is not only cool looking, it's also something that makes cooking hard to mess up. Or perhaps the Jesus Toaster is what you want for your daily bread?

3. Perfect Gift For The Pre-pubescent Nerd:


One thing most dweebs have in common is an inability to attract a mate. For those pimple-faced little boys, a Sci Fi Nerdcore Calendar with pictures of a hot girls may be as close as they'll get to touching human flesh all this year. You won't only be giving them a calendar, you'll be giving them hope -and, in a way, that's the greatest gift of all. (Update: This is no longer available.)


4. Perfect Gift For The Geeky Hipster:

Scenesters are all just nerds at heart, they're just losers who are still kind of cool. This Alien Coffee Press is a great gift to feed their caffeine addiction and give them something out of the ordinary to show their other dorky friends. It will go perfect with the Alien Mug and Saucer.

Staring AlienStaring Alien

5. Perfect Gift For The Geeky Baby:

Babies are the only creatures that look cute even with a load in their pants. Make light of their infancy plight with this cute "Diaper Loading...Please Wait onesie." Hey, nerdy babies need love too.

6. Perfect Gift For The Sugar Loving Nerd:

Know someone who loves sweets? Do they also love Star Wars? Then you have justs found the perfect gift for this dork. The R2 D2 cookie jar is just what the doctor ordered for your friends with the munchies. I have to admit, he's pretty darn cute. Of course, beware the product warning that advises you not to put food of any kind inside the R2 D2 cookie jar. Darn that pesky lead paint. (You can also get Darth Vader.)

7. Perfect Gift For The Dork Who Thinks He's A Knight:


Ah Ren-fair Geeks, you gotta love them, even if you think they're a total joke. Sometimes though, they can be intimidating, particularly when you get them the wrong gift and they scream about beheading you. So what is the right gift for a Renaissance fair lover? A mini catapult, of course!

8. Perfect Gift For The Pseudo Sophisticated Geek:


Photo by: Joyce Lyndurston [Flickr]

Who says nerds don't appreciate the finer things in life? When some techies grow up and become yuppies, they still need cool gadgets to remind them of their roots. This  Magnetic Wine Conditioner can turn crummy, run-of-the-mill wines into vintage beauties. The tool recreates the alcohol aging process magnetcis and accelerated aeration.

9. Perfect Gift For The Obsessed Gamer Nerd:

Gamers always need a cool way to store their games and this is probably the ultimate in video game design. This functional Nintendo controller coffee table looks awesome, stores video games on the inside and, best of all, actually works as an NES controller. Who wouldn't want this fantastic triumph over modern design? I'd sure love to bust some Tetris on this bad boy.


10. Perfect Gift For The Unfathomably Vain Nerd:

Know someone who's into dorking out and looking at themselves at the same time? Then they'll love to stare at their Legoselves all day and night. Who wouldn't love a life-sized version of themselves hanging out in their home? While Lego sculpting is cool, being an ego maniac is not, but the less they know, the better.

There you go, every dweeb, dork, L7 weenie and more should be satisfied with at least one gift from this list. Have a great holiday season!

Note: Updated and republished from article  first published on  December 3, 2008.

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Dec 3, 2008
by John P. Barker
John P. Barker's picture


I want ALL of these...

 Great article!

I wonder if they make that onesie in XL adult size...

Dec 3, 2008
by Anonymous


So #7...hey, there's dorkettes that think we're knights too! The Renfair is not just a boys club.