Bacon Bacon Everywhere: Top 10 Ways To Love Your Bacon
Yes, 2008 was simultaneously kind and cruel to bacon. While I'm sure that meat lovers everywhere appreciated the addition of bacon to many of their favorite foods, even their martinis. No one should have to suffer through some of these cringe-worthy creations.
1) The Bacon Wallet
If all your money is spent on your favorite pig products, then show your pride when you bring home the bacon in your styling pork wallet -it matches the next item, a bacon tuxedo, perfectly by the way.
2) The Bacon Tuxedo
Just look at this fantastic bacon tuxedo! Did I mention it actually smells like bacon? If you really are the type who needs to wear your meat on your sleeve. Lucky for the sane people in this world, this tux was actually just an April Fool's Day Joke on Mcphee.com .
On a similar note, the bacon scarves somehow make sense, as opposed to your other breakfast accessories, like the bacon and eggs cuff links. I think it's the long, strip-like nature of the scarves themselves that makes the bacon scarf a logical addition to any pork-lover's wardrobe.
4) Bacon Band Aids
Bacon band aids fit on a similar plane of existence, as another strip product. As long as your band aids don't contain any actual smoked meat particles, your wounds should heal just fine, and, in style.
5) Bacon Floss
Speaking of your health, remember to floss daily . Oh, and what freshening flavor could ever hope to beat out tingly spearmint? Why not the sparkling clean after taste of fried pig butt?
6) Bacon Toothpicks
Or, if you have some fillet mignon caught in your mouth, why not pick it out with a complimentary flavor...it's BACON!! Bacon toothpicks are a reasonable flavor option for all carnivorous meals, however, I don't know how well they may compliment your ice cream, unless it too is bacon.
7) Bacon Air Freshener
If the taste of bacon isn't enough for you and you need to have the smell follow you around, even in the most un-bacon of settings -your car. While you drive down the road snacking on your Wendy's Baconator, you'll be amazed at how much more bacon-y your sandwich tastes when paired with the bacon air freshener . It will seem especially yummy if it is first packed in your bacon lunch box.
8) Bacon USB
And, while it doesn't quite fit into our other inventions, what would any modern trend do without technology? The bacon USB has you covered, making sure that even your virtual world is still filled with cured meat images.
9) Bacon Wrapping Paper
Don't forget to wrap up the gifts for the pork lover in your life with this colorful and delicious looking wrapping paper. (Update: This wrapping paper is out of stock but this bacon wrapping paper is still available.)
10) Bacon Pillow
If all these bacon dreams have you ready to go to sleep, why put sugarplumsin your head with a normal acrylic pillow? No my friend, you need to dream meaty dreams with this cuddly bacon pillow. Nevermind the worries on his face, your drooling night face will be plastered with smiles.
Hopefully the whole bacon trend is coming to an end soon. Those of us who are true fans of friendly processed pork products will finally be able to breakfast in peace without the disturbance of the bacon bandwagon clearing out our grocery store of our delicious meat strips. The odds are though, that the bacon fad is only just begining, being as how bacon just beat fries in the senate vote on Monday night. Oh well, at least we know who the American public truly loves.