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The BBQ Branding Iron: You May Never Eat In Again

What could possibly ruin a perfectly seasoned and grilled medium rare ribeye steak? How about a message that says something like “Mike’s Penis Meat”. I’m not sure who Mike is, and I don’t know why his penis meat is being served for dinner, but I do know I wouldn’t be eating that ribeye. This would all play nicely into the hands of the cook who probably just wanted a leftover ribeye to take in for lunch tomorrow. I need some new friends.

I really can’t see any other way to use this BBQ Branding Iron. Sure you could write a cute little love message to your girl for that romantic candlelit dinner (gag) or you could write some witty commentary on the swine or bovine that are sponsoring your dinner (snooze), but really this thing was made for writing disgusting, off-color and perhaps cryptic one-liners on your buddies’ dinner.  And if it wasn’t specifically designed for that purpose, it has a destiny greater than the intent of its creation.

There's not much to the branding iron; it features 52 letters that you can arrange into place, lock, heat up in the grill and then use to sear whatever message you have in mind into your meat. Just easy enough to use on a night that you've had a couple of beers and want to add a little extra flavor to your grilling.  Have another Miller Light and let the imagination run rampant. It’s a gift that could keep on giving for quite a while.

So if you want to get started writing profane and stomach-turning messages at your next big backyard BBQ, go pick one up today. The BBQ Branding Iron sells for around 15 pounds (just under $23) and you can find it at Amazon.

 via Coolest Gadgets