From The Inventor's Workshop: Dog Poo Goes Walkies

Dogs. They come in all shapes and sizes, some big, some small. Some long, some short. Same goes for their poo. One thing is universal, and that is the fact that it's all pretty nasty stuff, especially if you walk in it barefoot.

For a while dog owners were able to get away with proudly watching their dog, back arched in territorial constriction, leaving behind a small (or large, depending on the dog and the diet) souvenir of its passage on the pavement, a kind of canine graffiti. Well done, boy. These days people are expected to clean up the graffiti, scooping it up in a plastic bag and depositing it in the nearest receptacle...Not the most enjoyable of daily duties by anyone's standards, beetles and fetishists excepted. Not only is it a fairly hideous thing to have to do, it also puts strain on the back and leaves you with a bag full of dogshit dangling from your wrist - not ideal if you are one of those people who has bought a dog in order to meet and charm the opposite sex on your daily walks. (fetishists excepted again)

Fret no more, here comes The Poover. The answer to all your poo-related prayers.

The Poover - canine excrament is no longer your problemThe Poover - canine excrament is no longer your problem

An extendable tube attached to a jet-propelled suction pump hangs elegantly around the shoulders, and can be fixed behind the back when not in use, using the handy waist couplings. When Maureen takes a little break, extend the 8-inch diameter tube, fire up the jet and hoover away. The dog eggs are removed at a ferocious rate, without leaving a trace behind. And it gets better. You don't want to be walking around with a container on your back full of Maureen's offerings, which is why the Poover doesn't have a bag or any sort of container at all. The Poover tube is completely open on both ends so that the poo, once sucked off the ground, is flung out of the other end of the tube, and jettisoned roughly 200 metres away, through an arc which reaches up to 150 ft into the air.

The mighty Poover in actionThe mighty Poover in action

Walking your dog just got a lot easier. Having a picnic possibly just got a lot more dangerous.

Sep 16, 2008
by Anonymous


What a wonderful idea! Now I can walk my dog and carry a smelly bazooka too! Most Dog laws state you have to clean it up, not fling it at someone!

Sep 16, 2008
by Anonymous

What a load of Sh**

Sholto Crow - Stop putting jokey made up stuff on this site!! I used to like coming on here and reading true stories or at the very least concepts that people are considering to make into real things!! Sholto Crow you idiot!

Sep 16, 2008
by Anonymous

What is wrong with you. I

What is wrong with you. I love his stuff. I think it is hilarious.
Ignore the real idiot.

Sep 17, 2008
by Anonymous

I liked it

who is maureen?

Sep 17, 2008
by Sholto


Your dog! Not a classic dog name but one which I am campaigning to be used more frequently by dog owners. Other good but underused dog names are: Dean, Steven, Mr Harris, Mum and 43.


Glad you liked it!