Fake Sideburns for Sunglasses: Great Idea?

There is probably no entertainer anywhere in the world who has earned more money (or at least as much money) dead than he did when he was alive. Elvis impersonators swarm Las Vegas and other glittery places and make a living imitating the late ‘king of rock and roll’ by officiating at weddings, bar mitzvahs etc. In keeping with the tradition of honoring the late king, are many, many products and intermittent re-releases of his music, which insures that his legacy (no matter how you may feel about it) will never die.

Let’s face it. No one ever asks, Elvis who?


Patent # Des 376,811, Fake Sideburns for Sunglasses, was created in 1996, almost two decades after Elvis really left the building. These fake sideburns are obviously not for everyone, and whether they are for anyone at all remains a moot point to this day. Still, they are innocuous and hint at fun with their own particular statement. These sideburns are only part of a disguise and yet they are immediately Elvis and no one else. That says something right there even if you don’t want to say it.

There are a myriad of Halloween products on the market today, and they are all designed to disguise and inspire the inner whatever in all of us. Consider Boomer Babe’s evaluation of the situation “2008's Funniest Adult Halloween Costumes” and Steve Levenstein’s “Girls Get the Anime Look with Extra-Wide Contact Lenses”.

Whatever you do, don’t be cruel to a heart that’s true. (My particular Elvis favorite.)