St. Patrick's Day is right around the corner and you know what that means: a whole lotta carousing and raucous behavior to commemorate the saint who drove the snakes out of Ireland! Doesn't sound like the most pious of celebrations, but who am I to argue with the mysterious workings of faith? This year, if you plan to mark St. Patrick's Day in the usual way, that is, somewhere other than church, then I've found the perfect accessory for you.
United States patent 490964 is for a Combin[ation] Clothes-Brush, Flask and Drinking Cup. Now, I agree that this is not a groundbreaking invention, but don't you just love something designed to help you get drunk then tidy-up afterwards? It just seems so practical and civilized!
For Those Who Like a Neat Drink
As you can see from the photo above, the device is really just a clothes-brush with a hollowed out handle that serves as a flask. Or, for you "the glass is half full types," the device is basically a flask with a clothes brush mounted on its back. Like all good flasks, this one has a screw-on cap for securing the precious liquid inside, and a small cup designed to snap into place over the cap. The cup serves the drinker's purposes, naturally, but also serves to make the entire device more streamlined and practical.
Thanks to this handy little device patented by Thomas W. Helm in 1893, you might be inspired to turn a new leaf - one shaped like a clover - this St. Patrick's Day. That's because with Helm's device you could theoretically engage in the obligatory drinking the holiday seems to call for, then tidy yourself up a bit before dragging your drunk butt to a local church (we are talking about a saint after all) in time to make amends for your drunken conduct. And therein lies the beauty of this patented device: its ability to indulge the user's less than admirable practices with the promise of redemption (sort of) afterwards.
A Clover I Overlooked Before?