If you're anything like me, you spend an inordinate amount of time typing away at your computer. You do so knowing every keystroke brings you one step closer to a carpal tunnel disease diagnosis; every glance at the screen teases your vision with astigmatism. So you buy an ergonomic keypad and mouse pad and you force yourself to look away from the screen every 20 minutes or so. Great! But now there is something else to worry about, something that threatens the great American pastime of television viewing: B.T.N.D. or Button Thumbing Numbness Disorder. Luckily, the cure is not worse than the disease.
The "experts" tell us that B.T.N.D. is brought about by constantly moving the thumb back and forth on the face of a remote control in search of that perfect T.V. fix. Personally, I suspect people who suffer from B.T.N.D. are just people who spend too much time with their thumbs up their a*s!
Anyway, the best way to protect yourself from these sorts of straining injuries is to restrict certain, unhealthy movements and the best restrictors out there often resemble a splint. Just take a look at United States patent 5220690 . The patent, issued in 1993 to Barbara J. Hoos, is for a Thumb Guard Novelty Device. No doubt, the "novelty" in the title comes from the sense that she doesn't take her husband's remote control inflicted illness very seriously.
The device consists of a flexible sheath [is] arranged to receive a thumb therewithin, wherein the sheath is directed to a sheath strap, and the sheath strap is secured to a mounting band. Essentially, a stiff hammock meant to keep your thumb still with the unintended bonus of punishing you for always hogging the remote control!
Thumb Guard in Action!
Of course, wearing the device won't qualify you for a handicap-parking sticker, but it will give the other members of your household a chance to control the remote for a while. So if you refuse to cut down on your television viewing and your tired of your friends and family accusing you of being a remote tyrant, get that thumb out of your butt and into a Thumb Guard, soon you'll be channel surfing again just like in the good old days: PAIN FREE!