Hillary Nut Cracker: Wacky Product of the Day

I wrote this very clever piece several weeks ago on the 10 Ways to Buy Hillary Clinton . Well, no one read and I don't know why. I guess it was lame? Well, if I had this product to add to the list of Great Hillary Clinton products, perhaps my article would have gotten a better reception. The merchant for this calls it "Completely Nuts".

If it's not readily apparent what it is, it's a Hillary Clinton Nutcracker.

Here's a closeup of her face. Pretty good resemblance, I'd say.

You can order this useful tool at HillaryNutCracker.com or at Amazon

Well, I am sure someone can come up with a catchy comment to go with this precious gift idea. Anyone?

Amused and Bemused
Wacky Innovations

Sep 5, 2007
by Steve Levenstein
Steve Levenstein's picture

Poor Mr. Bill...

You just know Bubba is gonna see this and moan "oh lordy, they got that right!". Hey, wonder if Hil gets royalties from sales, considering the frighteningly good likeness and all? Sealed

Sep 5, 2007
by Amused and Bemused

She's got bigger nuts than

She's got bigger nuts than anyone, so it must be hard for her to crush nuts without crushing her own.

Sep 5, 2007
by Anonymous Oral Roberts (not verified)

What Hillary Would Say If She Made It To The White House:

"I did NOT have sex with that nut!!!"

Sep 5, 2007
by Anonymous (not verified)

"I Can Crush Nuts Almost As Well As

I can crush mens' egos."

Sep 5, 2007
by Anonymous Coke E. Roberts (not verified)

People always did say I wore the pants;

I'm just now getting the nuts to go with them."

Sep 5, 2007
by Anonymous Mr. Planter (not verified)

Yeah, that's a walnut.

But when I urinate, I make peenuts.

Sep 5, 2007
by Anonymous (not verified)


This is one thing that does not require a village or community -- just a strong vagina and past exerperience with Kegel's.

Sep 5, 2007
by Anonymous Hillary (not verified)

When I Catch Bill Lying To Me,

I serve him pee-cans or piss-tachios (red piss-tachios at least once a month).

Sep 5, 2007
by Michelle
Michelle's picture

Pee-stacios...too funny. :)

Pee-stacios...too funny. :)

Sep 5, 2007
by Anonymous Ernie (not verified)

I think she'd rather

filbert between her legs.

Sep 7, 2007
by Steve Levenstein
Steve Levenstein's picture

Nut yuks...

She doesn't have much in the way of Mounds, so it looks like its gotta be Almond Joy. Hey, this'd work great on Crabs too, doncha think?

Sep 15, 2007
by Anonymous Obama (not verified)

Hillary Name Change:

She can really stir people up, so I propose:  Hellary.