Do you love to cut grass? I know I do. Do you find yourself wishing every day was Sunday so you could be out in the yard cutting grass all day long? Me too.
Are you so desperate to cut grass you have to hide it? Are you ashamed? Is it affecting your relationships? Your marriage?
If this sounds like you, then the folks at Big Daddy Driver may have the answer. The Big Daddy Driver may look like a real golf club, but it's really a weed whacker hidden in a secret compartment.
Here's how it works. After you've had breakfast, tell your wife you're going out in the yard to work on your golf game. Remember to take your golf cart with you. Forgetting that would be a dead giveaway that you're probably off to cut grass and not about to play golf.
It might be a nice touch to mention that you'll be practicing shots from the rough. Otherwise it may look suspicious. Especially if your wife happens to look out the window and see you standing around in long grass.
Also, it's probably best not to start cutting grass right away. You'll be excited, which is understandable, but try to contain yourself for a moment. Don't go out there like you're wielding a machete and about to take out a small village. Try to relax, and take a few practice swings first.
Once you're nice and loose, simply flip open the bottom of the driver to reveal the smooth operation, single-wire weed whacker. Now wind that sucker up and let hell roar. Hear the machine scream as it writhes in your bare hands, the thunder of your blood as you raze the countryside to its knees, grass flying like shrapnel all around you, the center of all destruction.
One other thing. Just be sure to keep a spare set of 6 AA batteries close by.
You can get the Big Daddy Driver at Hammacher.