Kiss My Ass! - 10 Great Hot Butt Ads (SFW)

Sex sells.  We all know the way that certain parts of the body are magnetic to the human eye.  And none draws the eye more than the tush... the derriere... the bum... the heinie...  the ass.  You know... the butt.

There's something about the posterior that distracts both men and women alike.

But... (Not butt, but... you know... but)...

Again the marketing people run amuck with ideas and we, as consumers, end out with a wide-range of "butt" related ad campaigns for all sorts of products-many of which I, as a consumer, wouldn't associate with the part of the body that we all sit on.

Be warned: this is gonna get ugly...

Hot Ass Ad #1. Bounty Chocolate (Mars Corporation)

She's partial to chocolate.  Get it?  I'm here all week.  Try the roast beef...She's partial to chocolate. Get it? I'm here all week. Try the roast beef...

When I think of chocolate, the last thing I want crossing my mind is a butt.  Call me juvenile, but... c'mon.  There's a certain brand name that has become synonomous with "squirts."

I do sort'a like the idea of this ad, however.  The notion that when you eat Bounty Chocolate, it won't go to your butt.  Cute.

Plus, the young lady is quite fetching-even with missing cheeks.


Hot Ass Ad #2. Ché Men's Magazine

Warning, Will Robinson!  Danger!  Danger!Warning, Will Robinson! Danger! Danger!

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that trying to get her phone number would not only get you slapped, but would also instigate a pounding by her ‘roided up testosterone beef-a-lo of a boyfriend.


Hot Ass Ad #3. Peugeot 206 HDi coupe Do they light up when she stops walking?Do they light up when she stops walking?

It took me a second to get this ad.  I stared at it for a bit, wondering if the tail lights actually worked, wondering about how comfortably those pants would be if I had them on while sitting on a stool in seedy bar... stuff like that.

Then the light came on.  Not the one on her butt, but the one over my head (and no, her butt wasn't over my head).

The Peugeot 206 HDi coupe is supposed to be sexy!  Got it!

Yes.  I'm rather slow on the uptake sometimes.  Just ask my girlfriend.


Hot Ass Ad #4. Dressing for Pleasure I'm sort'a partial to the red panties...I'm sort'a partial to the red panties...

Combine BDSM and a popular condiment (not condom-condiment... you people are sick) and you get something that can't complain when you smack it on the bottom.

The idea of putting fetishistic imagery on ketchup is really funny to me.  I don't know how popular this campaign will be.  I mean, I can't see a nun smacking a nice ass adorned with fishnet panties just to get a little flavor on a burger.

Then again...  Yeah.  I can see that...  And I'm calling you people sick?

I'm gonna make an appointment with my therapist as soon as I'm done writing this article.  Promise.


Hot Ass Ad #5. SemosIs it a vase or two faces?Is it a vase or two faces?

At first I thought this was an ad for some sort of "slimming" underwear.  Nope.  Turns out that Photoshop lessons can make you lose weight-at least in an ad.


Hot Ass Ad #6. O2 Fitness

I've considered getting butt cheek implants...I've considered getting butt cheek implants...

I wonder how many people would choose the pain of popping their butt cheeks?  I suffer from "NoAssAtAll" disease, so I would probably keep my giant blue balloons-if only to provide cushioning while sitting on a barstool.


Hot Ass Ad #7. Arcor Bubble Gum

I wouldn't want to blow THAT bubble...I wouldn't want to blow THAT bubble...

Butt-face.  ‘Nuff said.


Hot Ass Ad #8. Styx Underwear


I bet that card would smell...


Hot Ass Ad #9. Jobs In Town

The Inverse Big Bang TheoryThe Inverse Big Bang Theory

At least the people are walking IN.  If they were coming out, it would explain how God created mankind.


Hot Ass Ad #10. Durex Play Lubricant

Party Night in Palm Bay, Florida.  I live there.  I should know...Party Night in Palm Bay, Florida. I live there. I should know...

Okay... I told ya this was gonna get ugly.

My ex-wife is a Physician Assistant.  During her clinical rotations, she told me a story involving a mustard jar jammed in an anatomical area that... well, just wasn't designed to have a mustard jar in it.

But even she never saw something like this.

Yep-that's a canoe.

That must be the most slippery lubricant ever.  EVER.


SOURCES: Ads of the World, WackyWeirdWonderful.Bestsnippets
Feb 19, 2009
by M Dee Dubroff
M Dee Dubroff's picture

 John- Very


Very funny! 



Yours in Words,

M Dee Dubroff

Russian Innovations

Feb 19, 2009
by J. Barker
J. Barker's picture


It was fun to write...  Glad you liked it!

Feb 19, 2009
by Anonymous

Very cool

and I like your comments. :-)

Feb 19, 2009
by Anonymous

Great article :) When I saw

Great article :) When I saw the picture on the main page I thought it was just gonna be pictures of butts.