"Need This?" has only been running for a few days, and already the industry is challenging us. Moto Art is pushing the very boundaries of pointlessness by selling an aircraft ejector seat which
- Is not in an aircraft
- Does not eject
It's like they're daring us to make fun of them.
You may think there's a market for the chair, but this is not a funny-gag product. This is a Brewster's Millions "I've got to lose a lot of money fast" product. They won't even list the prices online. That's a sign that unless you've told your second sub-accountant to sort this out for you, you can't afford it. While the chair is undeniably cool looking, you could get the same effect for less by paying everyone you meet fifty dollars to say your chair is awesome.
I could point out the horrible disrespect of putting parts from a B-52 Bomber, flying fortress in the greatest struggle in mankind's history, under the flabby rears of bored accountants. But I recently wrote about a Spongebob-themed rectal thermometer and am no longer qualified to talk about respect in any capacity.
The worst thing is the missed opportunity: there are millions of soul-tired office monkeys who'd pay serious money for a real office escape seat. Which is why I'll be developing a series of leather-backed chairs with motorised wheels, a "Swimming pool maintenance in exotic climates" book on the armrest, and a ticket to the Bahamas stuffed down the back.