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RIP YouTube [2005-2013], The End Of An Era

Man, we were all fooled. We're being told today, YouTube was launched in 2005 with one sole goal in mind -- to surface the best video of all time. It's taken 8 short years, but the panel of judges are now ready to get down to brass tacks and start the hard work, which according to Google will take 10 long years hence.

But in the meantime, at midnight of March 31, 2013, employees from YouTube announced that the site will go offline for a 10-year hiatus. They'll then begin narrowing down the best video judging process, with a winner announced when YouTube comes back online -- wait for it -- in 2023?


The tear-jerking pity of all this is that all of the personal videos we've uploaded over the years will be swept away into a digital heap of deletions as well, no longer available for public consumption. But were we prewarned? No, for God's sake it was Easter Sunday? Who knew?

Antoine Dodson, a judge in the contest (and YouTube celebrity) adds, "We are all story tellers, that's what Antoine DodsonAntoine Dodsonpulled me into this contest... I encourage everybody to watch as many videos as possible before YouTube deletes everything tonight (March 31, 2013)."

Other notable YouTube celebrities as witnessed in the above video shared their deepest hopes of being selected as the best video on YouTube. "I'd better win," says Matt Harding of "Where the Hell is Matt?" fame. "Otherwise, all those years traveling the world were just an expensive waste of time."

Even Stinkin' Lincoln and his car-salesman approach at judging this year's Academy Awards will no longer have a shot at reaching even 7,000 views. . . and he was getting so close!


There's one consolation however. At least we won't have to put up with another inane dance craze. No longer will Gangnam Style, nor the Harlem Shake be able to build future earworms. . . you know, that inability to dislodge a song and prevent it from repeating itself in one's head over, and over again.

In addition to the YouTube glory of having once been associated with this discontinued 8-yr experiment, the winner will also walk away with the grand prize of an MP3 players that clips to one sleeve. WOW, even Stinkin' Lincoln was bowled over by the chance at winning such a coveted award.

And if you believe all that, you might also be fooled this April 1st, with the fact that Twitter is launching a new service for $5 a month, called "Twttr." Yup, the microblogging  platform is releasing a consonant-only plan, where those who tweet will no longer have to ever use a vowel again.


And as our favorite ex-Governor of Alaska was known to say: "Say, it ain't so, Joe!"