Road Kill: Stuffed Animals Are All Grown Up And Seriously Twisted

Gals, if your guys are still teasing you because of your stuffed animals, it is time to get them on the plushie bandwagon with some animals of their own. These adorable, umm, well, formerly adorable critters may be just the thing. They are soft, squishy, and . . . seriously squashed. These Roadkill Toys are not for the faint of heart, but they are for those with a seriously twisted sense of humor.

 Grind the Road Kill RabbitGrind the Road Kill Rabbit

There are a variety of dead animals to choose from -- Grind, the rabbit (currently out of stock); Twitch, the raccoon; Splodge, the hedgehog; Smudge, the squirrel. Each one comes with popped eyes, plush guts squashed out, and those iconic tire treads across their flattened carcasses.

 Twitch the Road Kill RaccoonTwitch the Road Kill Raccoon

On the plus side these creatures are dry and free of that smell of decomposition, and there are no flies or buzzards cruising for a tasty bit of carrion  While so VERY wrong, they are also seriously funny.

 Splodge the Road Kill HedgehogSplodge the Road Kill Hedgehog

The funny doesn't stop with just the critter itself. Each of the deceased animals comes in its own little body bag for safe keeping. No need for an autopsy since cause of death is so very obvious -- the only question was if the culprit was a Ford or a Toyota.

 Road Kill Body BagRoad Kill Body Bag

Each of the furry flattened ones also come with its own death certificate so that you have proof that you weren't the one who caused the damage.

 Road Kill Death CertificateRoad Kill Death Certificate

If road kill is not exactly your cup of cocoa, then perhaps you would rather have a bit of Canned Unicorn Meat. Each can comes with an entire unicorn inside - neatly cut into pieces ready to use in your favorite recipe.

 Canned Unicorn MeatCanned Unicorn Meat

Again, so VERY wrong, and yet so funny.

To order Roadkill Toys, click here.

To order Canned Unicorn, click here.

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