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Take A Relaxing Bike Ride And Let Gruber Do The Pedaling

You know what sucks about biking? The biking. More specifically, the pedaling. This is particularly true if you're chronically out-of-shape with no desire to get back into shape. Cruising down a long, winding downhill is pretty money, but when you bottom out and start cranking up the business end of that valley, biking takes a real plunge in fun factor.

There's no need to let those calves burn any longer. The Gruber Assist is a small, low profile electric motor that retrofits inside your seat tube and provides you with a little extra muscle. It allows you to get some extra boost into each pedal stroke without using all the energy. The Assist won't completely take over for your manual pedaling, so you'll still get some exercise, but it will take a bit of the sting out of those uphills that never end. 

The device is powered by a rechargeable NiMH battery that is designed to be put in your bike pack during use. You turn it off and on, or more accurately from "real exercise" to "pretend exercise", with a handlebar-mounted switch. Since it fits seamlessly inside your tube, your girlfriend won't even have a clue what a lazy phoney you are. Mock her as she huffs and puffs up that brutal hill and you sit at the top smoking a cigarette. Ha, ha, ha. Douche.

Now, you're probably thinking:  "Why would I get a motor for my bike when I could just go out and get a motorized bike, aka motorcycle."  And seeing as how the Gruber will cost you close to $2500, you are quite correct in this line of questioning. I'm sure you could find a better use for that money. As explained by Gruber, the Assist is for "Everyone [who] would like to avoid unhealthy over-exertion during biking!" In other words, anyone who likes to feel like they've exercised, without actually doing much, and doesn't mind paying out the ear to do so. Still, it is an interesting product.

Gruber via DVICE