Take A "Stand" For Self Defense
No matter which side of the gun debate you fall on, the truth is that you want to be able to defend yourself in case of an intruder in some way. Now you can go no further than the bedside table and don't need to hide that old baseball bat under the bed. If you have the Self Defense Night Stand you are seconds away from being ready for combat.
The night stand breaks down into a shield and club so that you can stand your ground. That is if the intruder hasn't already shot you because it took you five minutes to move the books, your glasses, you cell phone, find a safe spot for the lamp and then remember how to disassemble it. Of course, you would hopefully start doing this the minute you hear the glass breaking when the burglar was breaking in.
If you are really planning on defending yourself in this manner you may also want to invest in some training so that you have a clue as to what you are doing.
Chances are that the best defense that this table can provide will be by your looking so ridiculous in your Ninja Turtles pajamas and bear claw slippers wielding a table leg and wearing a table top that your attacker will die laughing.
On the other hand, it is an entertaining piece of furniture that will generate a ton of stories. If you don't put it in the bedroom, it can be the place to rest your beer in your man cave (or woman cave).