Thanksgiving Patents - Part 3: Narcissistic Gourd Molds
The Perfect Thanksgiving Dinner: Step 3
The following is the third installation in a multi-part series exploring innovative and unusual patents that could help make your Thanksgiving celebration the best ever!
So, you loved my ideas for a more authentic Thanksgiving holiday and you've decided to faithfully follow my advice - next year. You've started looking into shooting lessons and have even inquired about a gun permit. You have a plan for making the most of the January post-holiday bargains at traditional brick and mortar stores, as well as online retailers, in search of deals on a turkey cooking jacket or other such device that will make your turkey tasty. But those bargains simply won't do when it comes to your need for a holiday table worthy of your prized bird. This time next year you'll have gone to a lot of trouble to make Thanksgiving less ordinary and more personal. So why not do the same for your table decorations? I've found a patent for an inexpensive way to decorate your table in an extraordinary fashion: Narcissistic Gourd Molds!
A cornucopia of autumn produce and foliage is a traditional holiday favorite, if not a little predictable and overplayed. Yet with some time and planning you can assemble a unique cornucopia centerpiece spilling with gourds in the shape of your own head, or any other shape for that matter! Not unlike the rest of us, I suppose Richard Tweddell, III, the inventor of the gourd molds, dreamed of a beautifully appointed Thanksgiving table resplendent with good food, fine drink and glamorous guests. But just like the rest of us, he probably found himself year after year short on time, even shorter on patience, and seated at a table packed tightly with old familial gibes and wounds. And like you, he might have vowed that next year he would do things differently. Well dear readers, I am happy to report that we are all the lucky recipients of Tweddell's promise.
United States patent 4827666 allows you to [grow] squash, cucumbers and other fruits in desired shapes. That's right. This patent allows you to literally shape the destiny of many root vegetables and hardy fruits alike. Tired of a Thanksgiving table visited by too many people like your aunt Millie? Why not have Britney Spears or Albert Einstein perched atop your grandmother's antique linen tablecloth from Europe? With Tweddell's Method and Apparatus for Molding Fruits you can turn this fantasy into a reality.
If you're lucky enough to be blessed with a green thumb, the whole thing is easy and quite ingenious. The fruit, while growing on the plant, is enclosed within the internal cavity of an oversized mold having a cavity (inside) surface configured to form the desired details on the fruit. As growth continues the fruit fills the cavity and in doing so conforms with remarkable fidelity to the internal details of the mold. The mold is yieldable so as to allow the fruit to continue to expand outwardly after it has grown against the mold. The mold can be opened or removed after the fruit has conformed to its details, and the fruit is removed from the plant. And don't think for one minute that your little work of agriart will fade into oblivion after the last turkey croquette has been eaten, about a week after Thanksgiving. It doesn't have to because, if dried, [the fruit] can provide a long-lasting sculptural item. Admit it, it doesn't get much better than real art!
But hurry; if you want your gourds ready for next Thanksgiving you'll have to start planting soon and planning your mold shapes even sooner. So go ahead. Don't be afraid to try your hand at an Elvis squash or Che Guevara cucumber. The possibilities are endless!
Be sure to log in often, as this is the last week I will be covering patents guaranteed to make this Thanksgiving your most memorable ever! So, you won't want to miss the next installment of The Perfect Thanksgiving Dinner.