The Top 10 Weird & Bizarre Japanese Toothpastes

When a new toothpaste hits store shelves in Japan it's expected to fight tooth and nail – especially tooth – to gain traction in an already hyper-competitive marketplace. Is it any wonder that, like Japan's many weird & bizarre soft drinks and the teeth of those who drink them, offbeat yet innovative toothpastes keep coming out? 



10) Takoyaki (Octopus Balls) Toothpaste

Takoyaki toothpaste isn't really made with octopus balls; for which countless octopi are heaving sighs of relief. It does smell like them, though, which could wreak havoc on your own love life. (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Artoy Online Shop

9) Binotomo Eggplant Toothpaste

No octopi were harmed in the making of Takoyaki toothpaste but unfortunately we can't say the same for Binotomo Eggplant toothpaste. It's also unfortunate that Binotomo has made a toothpaste out of eggplants. Not looking so smug now are we, Vegans? (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Kodawarikan)  

8) Bamboo Charcoal Toothpaste

Remember those cheesy ads on the back of comic books for soap that turned your hands black? So does Taketora, the makers of Bamboo Charcoal toothpaste. Some gags never get old, amiright? (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Taketora)  

7) Too's Smile Toothpaste

We're not quite sure what to make of Too's Smile toothpaste other than that it seems to make your molars grin. Which begs the philosophical question: when teeth smile, do they show their teeth, and on and on and on? (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via fmfm75   

6) Dental Pasty Cream

Hmm, you'd think “Pasty Cream” was a product popular with burlesque dancers. Since said dancers also brush their teeth, one would hope they never mix up their Dental Pasty Cream with their, er, other pasty cream. Ouchies! (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Tyatubo)      

5) Spagyric Toothpaste

Spagyric processes involve alchemical procedures employed in producing various herbal medicines, tinctures and essences. Spagyric toothpaste is used to turn teeth white, much like medieval alchemists turned lead into gold. (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Mmmiho      

4) Breath Palette Toothpaste

Thirty-one flavors... not just for ice cream anymore, thanks to Breath Palette toothpaste. Though one of the flavors is boring old Peppermint, others include Lavender, Salt, Green Tea and Indo Curry. (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Jonelle Patrick's Only In Japan  

3) Change Toothpaste

Change we can believe in? Change your dentist can believe in, more likely, since he or she is the who'll be noticing the results (if any) of your changing to Change toothpaste. (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Naomoe3)   

2) To Be White Toothpaste

To be, or not to be... white? This slightly cringe-worthy toothpaste won't affect your life or your current race, though it may affect your friendships with those of OTHER races. (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Beautimania)          

1) Dirty Gorilla Perfume Toothy Tabs

Lush's “Dirty” Gorilla Perfume Toothy Tabs isn't a toothpaste per se, though it becomes one once you chew a tab and commence foaming at the mouth. Hey, we said chew A tab, not a dozen! (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image via Kagura Dance


Sorry to be giving you the brush-off but you know the drill: this post has come to a close. Thanks for reading... and we hope your giggling wasn't all due to the effects of the nitrous oxide. (bizarre Japanese toothpaste image at top via Midnight Blue Over Drive and above via Tarako Kewpie-chan Diary)

EDITOR'S NOTE: The U.S. also has some unusual toothpastes like the cupcake toothpaste, bacon toohtpaste and nihilist toothpaste to enjoy.

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