The Top 10 Weirdest and Funniest Japanese Condoms

4) Skins Mobile... for Safe Phone Sex


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Over half a billion condoms are sold in Japan each year but it seems the manufacturers still have extra capacity and are looking for new markets to, umm, penetrate. Witness "Skins Mobile", basically condoms for your cell phone. No, they aren't lubricated, so don't get any "hey, guess where I'm calling from!" ideas. Skins Mobile are sold in 3-packs for $6.99 and are thin enough to let sound waves - but not hot-tub waves - pass right through. (condom via Coolness Roundup )

 

 

3) When it comes to Nuts, ask a Squirrel


What would Bullwinkle think?What would Bullwinkle think?
OK, the fur-bearin' varmints may know about nuts but does that qualify them to advertise condoms? Evidently it does, but the poor critters seem a mite confused: they're using them as rain hats! Or, pardon the phrase, Pith Helmets (I slay me). We assume human users will know better. What I'd like to know is, do the actual condoms really display a smiling squirrel's face? (condom via J3TLAG )

 

 

2) "We are all brack people", so can't we all get a wrong?


"I have a (wet) dream!""I have a (wet) dream!"
What can I say... the "Power BLACK Color Rubber" is so wrong on so many levels, I'm speechless. Heck, the Reverend Jesse Jackson would be left speechless, and that takes some doing. If he sees these condoms he just might cancel Operation PUSH!

Seeing this condom package reminded me that Japan is a very strange place indeed. The image of a very black panther and his "you go girlfriend" is enough to make Eldridge reach for a Cleaver, but it's nothing compared to the copy on the package. On the left we have "Keep it real. Keep on faith. Keep on going. Piece! So cool. Respect!" You tell 'em, Aretha! Then on the right there's "Stay real! WE are all brack people"... Hallelujah! It's like they locked up the package designer in a room with a few rap CDs and some bad acid for a week and this was the result. (condom via Physics Forums , image via Engrish.com )

 

 

1) Super Big Boy Condoms... to Win, Place or Show!


Whoa... easy now big fella!Whoa... easy now big fella!

You know, there is a sort of endearing innocence to the Japanese sensibility that comes through from time to time, and this is one of those times. The earnest marketers at Okamoto seized upon a single, archetypal image to illustrate the boxes of their largest condoms. Yes, it's a horse. A horse, people!

Slap a pack of these babies down on the nightstand and you've got yourself a no-win situation: she either runs from the room screaming, or - minutes later - sighs with disappointment. According to Okamoto, "Exceptional cutting of Okamoto condom with absolutely more liberation, this condom is designed for you." Mr. Ed, maybe, but not Mr. Steve. Oh, but there's more: "It also employ a new odour masker technology to cut the irritating smell of condom." Yeah, don't you just hate that? Actually I never get close enough to notice, but I'll take their word for it. For those who want to pony up for a dozen before they saddle up, that'll be $18.40, pardner. (condom via Sampson Store )

And there you have it, The Top 10 Weirdest Japanese Condoms. Who thought safe sex could be so much fun? Perhaps you'll be inspired to spice up your condom life with some interesting condom samplers from  from Japan and the U.S. available on Amazon.

SEE ALSO:
Top Ten Even Weirder & Funnier Japanes Condoms
Top 10 Weird and Bizarre Japanese Soft Drinks

 

Steve Levenstein
Japanese Innovations Writer
InventorSpot.com

Comments
Jul 17, 2007
by Irvan (not verified)

wow, kit kat condom. very

wow, kit kat condom. very interesting stuff. :D

-IT-

Jul 17, 2007
by ccmixph (not verified)

have a break, have a kit

have a break, have a kit sack! hehe

Jul 17, 2007
by TV Online (not verified)

Zombie Condom

Is that the same Suzuki as the automobile/bike manufacturer?

Jul 17, 2007
by Anonymous (not verified)

Comment

Please dont break me off a piece of this kit sack bar!!!

Jul 17, 2007
by The Daniel (not verified)

Duh

Fe+ Male = IRON MAN

Jul 17, 2007
by Steve Levenstein
Steve Levenstein's picture

Duh Duh

Thanks, "The Daniel", for that inspiring buzz-kill. Now run along and find that sense of humor you misplaced :o)

Jul 17, 2007
by Patrick Carroll (not verified)

"Super Big Boy"

Perfect for the smallest cocks in Asia.

Jul 17, 2007
by Steve Levenstein
Steve Levenstein's picture

If you say so...

I'll take your word for it, Patrick, you seem to be an authority on the subject.

Jul 19, 2007
by Anonymous Wacko Jacko (not verified)

Kit Sack

For milky substances inside and out?

Jul 19, 2007
by Nick (not verified)

Condoms in Japan - Some Advice

You might laugh at "Super Big Boys" and other "L" or "XL" condoms, but most Westerners in Japan (and some Japanese too) actually need them.

Before the Supers there were regular "Big Boys" sporting an image of a large middle-eastern-looking nose - a classic reference to gaijin (foreigners). They were a bit tight, but actually usable in contrast to regular local brands.

So be warned. If you're heading to Japan, BYO or shop carefully.

Jul 20, 2007
by Anonymous (not verified)

WTF?

Some of these stories proves the editor is simply an idiot. Maybe he/she or he and she doesnt get any to really understand the creative insight from these products.

Jul 20, 2007
by Steve Levenstein
Steve Levenstein's picture

Dumb & dumber

Who says the designs aren't creative? They are - and humorous as well. The previous poster, proud to be "anonymous" just doesn't get it... or "any", in all likelihood. 

Jul 20, 2007
by Anonymous (not verified)

hmm... Steve, that odor

hmm... Steve, that odor thing is for the ladies. I hope you're more sensitive in the sack than you are on your blog. WE give head usually and if you're not monogamous you should always use a condom.

 

but I assume you know that because you don't question the flavoured condoms.

 

anyway, granted these are some pretty strange condoms but not the strangest or funniest in Japan. just the otaku internet.

Jul 20, 2007
by Steve Levenstein
Steve Levenstein's picture

Ask me no questions, i'll tell you no lies

Such a tease... we're all looking forward to YOUR list. Bring it on!

Aug 8, 2007
by weirdbase.blogspot.com (not verified)

Asians are really doing weird things..

but that's nice :))

Aug 15, 2007
by Anonymous22 (not verified)

JAPANS are SICK!

JAPANS are SICK!

Aug 16, 2007
by Anonymous (not verified)

You mean Japanese, you

You mean Japanese, you inbred hick?

Aug 21, 2007
by Saturn clutch kit (not verified)

cool

these japanese are very creative.

Nov 20, 2007
by Tracy (not verified)

Japanese Condoms

Japanese condoms are among the finest in the world. In fact, the best and most innovative condoms available today are actually from Japan. You can buy Japanese condoms in UK's leading condom store. www.CondomEmpire.com. Use them, and you won't want to use other condoms!

Apr 17, 2008
by Anonymous

hey

there alsome you freak

Jul 29, 2008
by Anonymous

To be fair....

Half of those condoms are sold as kind of novelty items in a store called "Condomania" or somesuch - it's like a spencer's gifts but only for condoms.

"Super Big Boy" and "Power Black" are the real deal however.

Aug 5, 2008
by Anonymous

Good idea!

I think the U.S. could learn a thing or two from this approach to marketing condoms. Having a cute cartoon character or a colorful, happy wrapper eases some of the tension and stigma that seems to surround contraception in our country. One Condoms (onecondoms.com) is the only brand that I have found that realizes this and has shifted the focus of their packaging from being less utilitarian and plain (That means you,Trojan) to being more welcoming and clever in it's design.

Aug 17, 2008
by Anonymous

Kit Sack

So is that a 2 finger or a 4 finger? XD

Nov 17, 2008
by Anonymous

BTW...

the term "horny" actually comes from the Pagan horned god, Cerunnous. He had a ram's head, and the horns were a symbol of his (and men's) virility. From this, we also get the two handed "bunny ears" that people sometimes use in photographs, behind people's heads. It actually means, "Hey, you have a high sperm count!" This is also where we get the cornucopia from. Just thought you should know that fun little fact. ^.^