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Ten Things You Don't Need for St Patrick's Day

Alcohol and poor purchasing choices go hand in hand. Which is why some businesses think they can sell crap by sticking "It's fun/beer related!" on the front. They are wrong.

Need This? Office Ejector Seat

Pulling parts from old World War II planes? Call it art and you can charge what you like!

Need This? Three Thousand Dollar Accordion

Whatever the sport, music or demented pastime, someone has found a way to uber-technologise it. This unfortunately includes the accordion.

Need This? Electronic Laughter Meter

Not content with building our cars and opening our doors, now machines will tell us how funny we think things are.

Need This? USB Mouse Typing Speedometer

If you need an ugly plastic robo-mouse to encourage you while you type then we've found the perfect product for you! Also, we think you're crazy and want you to keep away from us.

Need This? Spongebob Squarepants Rectal Thermometer

Someone, somewhere thought that children's cartoon characters and rectal thermometry were an ideal combination. Amazingly, this person has not been arrested.

Need This? Vodka-based Musical Machines




We've all been to a wedding reception, a business dinner, or a family gathering that's gone on a little too long. We've all seen someone who insists on making music out of wine glasses, not content to have a single but drunkenly trying to set up a whole scale of glassware. read more »

Need This? Computerised Catflap


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What do you get when you combine a cat and military-developed technology?

Computerised Canine Enjoys Your USB



The motto of the intrepid inventor is "Build it, and they will come. With cash." Never has that saying been truer than with the USB Humping Dog, a gadget so technically pointless as to make a shaved kiwi look like a scalpel. read more »